Thursday, June 30, 2011

I'm NOT okay.

Up until this point in my life, if anyone asked me, "Are you okay?" the answer would be a resounding "YES!"

Kelly, your mom tried to kill herself again. Are you okay? YES!
Kelly, a family member has been hospitalized. Are you okay? YES!
Kelly, {insert any situation here}. Are you okay? YES!

The answer was always, "YES, I'm okay," because to not be okay would be less than perfect. I had to have perfect faith, and be perfect, and act perfect, and be perfectly okay.

But this week something has shaken me to my core. The tragic death of a young infant in my extended family. It was an accidental death, and the family has huge grief. And while we all know Jesus and love him, the pain is overwhelming.

And so I need you to know 2 things.

1. I am not trying to be perfect anymore. I am just me. *and*
2. I am definitely NOT okay.

Chatty Kelly