Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Grace or Discipline?

"I forgot my lunch. Will you bring it for me?"

I couldn't help but sigh. I guess the fact that my daughter called while I was unloading the dishwasher, her job, that she'd also "forgotten" to do before she left for school. And the fact that I had asked her, before she left, "Do you want me to pack your lunch?" But she had wanted to do it herself. Now she was calling for me to pack and bring her lunch which would force me to change my plans.

"Can't you buy your lunch?" I asked. She didn't like what they were having. I signed again and said, begrudgingly, that I would bring her lunch. "Nevermind, I'll just buy." Now I'd hurt her feelings. *sigh!* I told her it was no problem, and that I'd see her by lunchtime.

Grace? Discipline? Which applied here? Should I have made her buy her lunch, teaching her a lesson in responsibility? Should I have cheerfully agreed, showering her with grace? There are no easy answers! She isn't characterized by forgetting her lunch, in fact this was her first time, and she has a brand new Vera Bradley lunch box she wanted to bring, so I guess I made the right decision. Although I did inform her that next time she forgets, she will be buying her lunch.

I'm thankful for a heavenly father who knows just when to give discipline, and always acts in grace. I'd elaborate more, but now, I need to pack a lunch and run an errand.

Grace, mercy and peace from God the Father and from Jesus Christ, the Father’s Son, will be with us in truth and love. 2 John 1:3

Chatty Kelly


Kathryn Ross said...

Hi Kelly! I found you through Bonita's blog. I saw your face at the bottom of her post today under the "You Might Like This" list. It was her post back in 2009 when she interviewed you about the Philly Writer's Conference. I went about three years in a row - 2003, 2004, 2005 - possibly 2006 - are we really entering 2012??

Point is - Having been to that conference I was eager to read of another who'd been there. I wasn't blogging at the time and my writing ambitions were in a flux. I was working as a writer, speaker, dramatist, performer - doing a great deal of playwriting, producing and directing, but the devotional and novels stirring in my heart were elusive.

Then time just isn't on your side to keep it all up. So, I laid aside my book publishing ambitions and have settled into just the enrichment programs I write for the purpose of speaking - and the plays. Currently on staff at two public charter schools as the drama teacher. A mission field, to be sure.

This has been a year where the words "Grace" and "discipline" have been interchangeable in my walk - a year when the Lord finally led me to commit to a blog and through which I have met so many like minds and kindred spirits who have ministered to me in this stormy year of pruning and "re-arranging of furniture" - one of my earlier posts this year as God was preparing me for some stormy seas where I am - even now - in the throes of being tossed.

Love your Chatty Kelly name - very like me - the original Chatty Kathy - my 1961 model of her sitting on a shelf in my office/studio here. I hope to enjoy your chatting and our commonplaces more as I'll be following you. Hope you'll do the same over at my place - The Writer's Reverie.

Thanks for the good Word today!

Jenny wren's nest said...

Kevin Leyman says that you should let your kids suffer there owns consiquences, so they learn responibility. its part of growing up, they cant rely on you for the rest of there life. It really works but very hard to watch them go throught.
Have a new teen by friday was the book I read.
Jenny wren

Melanie said...

I would have done all of the above...I HAVE done all of the above.

Sharon Sloan said...

Grace-Based Parenting by Tim Kimmel is a great resource. In this case, since she is not characterized by forgetfulness or irresponsibility, bringing her new VB lunch box and showing grace was right on! :) Since you were able to bring it to her, that was great. She will remember your grace. And she will remember to not forget too! :

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.