Friday, August 5, 2011

Good-bye Self Doubt!

Those who know me may see a woman filled with self confidence...but behind that mask is a scared kid full of self doubt. That little voice that whispers, "You're nothing. Why would anyone care about what you have to share. They won't like you." The thing that surprises me every time, however, is how God ministers to my doubt with His perfect timing!

After much encouragement from friends I submitted my first article, sure it wasn't good enough, but with a tiny glimmer of hope that maybe my friends were right. Maybe I was an okay writer. It was accepted for publication. God knew if it had been rejected, I would have never submitted another thing, but buoyed by that success, I continued writing for publication. Good-bye self-doubt.

In 2009, after a writers conference I decided to stop writing for a while. I wrote this post, explaining that I was tired of rejections, and felt like there were so many better writers. But the day before I posted it, I got an contract for a piece that the editor had already rejected! It had already been rejected! But God...he knew I wasn't going to keep writing, so he encouraged me that my writing is His plan. Good-bye self doubt.

Yesterday was a self doubt day for my speaking. While my She Speaks conference was excellent, all those self doubts came back. There are better speakers, I don't want to risk rejection, why did I agree to do a women's retreat?!?! And so yesterday, I told a friend that I might stop speaking after I do the women's retreat in October. Self doubt.

My mouth said, "I don't want to speak again." My heart said, "Why would anyone want to listen to me? I have nothing to share. What if they don't like me? I can't do it."

And this morning, in my email inbox was a request to speak at a women's event. No self-promotion or seeking on my part, just God whispering to my heart, "You have something to say, I believe in you. Share My Word." Good-bye self doubt.

Why doubts are plaguing you today? Why not turn them over to God. He can turn your self doubt into God confidence! Then you too can say, "Good-bye Self Doubt!"

I am the LORD your God. I am holding your hand, so don't be afraid. I am here to help you. Isaiah 41:13 (CEV)

Chatty Kelly


Penny said...

What a good reminder. =)

Sue J. said...

Self-doubt stems from self. Even Thomas, who had shown such boldness in the presence of Jesus, would succumb to doubt in his resurrection. There is something within our humanness--not to mention the persistence and persuasiveness of Satan--to cause us to forget that our strength is in God alone.

The more we trust that He is working in us and that it's not us going it alone--for us or for Him--the more we can let earthly stuff fall by the wayside.

Sharon Sloan - Joy In The Truth said...

Amen sister! "Speak My Word". His Word bring life. Give them His Word. Leave them with His Word.

SO excited He encouraged you in such an intimate, special way!


Sonya Lee Thompson said...

AMEN! Loved it!

B His Girl said...

I am so glad you are pressing forward Kelly. Sometimes I think it is the ones who don't stop that arrive:). I do not know the Lord's plans for you but I do know Satan would love for you to stop. Go in His power! B

Julie Gillies said...

Oh Kelly, I can so relate to the self-doubt you've battled. But I simply love how the Lord ALWAYS encourages you to keep going through those open doors. You DO have something to say. And you have a UNIQUE way of saying it. Let your beautiful, spunky, hilarious personality shine through, girl, and watch what God does in and through you!


A multi-dimensional life said...

Oh what a wonderful word of encouragement, Kelly! I needed to read this today! Isn't it amazing how God brings us back where we are supposed to be and reassures us?! You have a beautiufl gift that He wants you to use for His are doing just that!!!

Thank you!!