Wednesday, April 23, 2008

White Lies

I am a big advocate of the truth. I try to be careful not to lie and rebuke others who do. But Saturday my husband told a lie, for me. And I was so thankful for it! We had a big family dinner to go to. "Christmas in April" my dad called it. So my siblings and I all had things we were supposed to bring. I was in charge of all the paper products, sweet potato casserole and potato salad. There wasn't room for the potato salad in my fridge so I put it in the garage fridge.

I'm sure you can guess what happened. Remember I'm an "out of sight, out of mind" personality. So we got about 1/2 way to my sisters (30 minutes of the 1 hour drive) and I exclaimed "Oh no! I forgot the potato salad." Now, you don't know my dad, but he is stickler for details and relentless. He would have gone on all day about how I forgot the potato salad. And my husband knows I am very sensitive to criticism, so he said "I will tell him I was supposed to bring the potato salad and I forgot it. He won't say anything to me." He justified it by saying that his job is to take care of me, and so if I forgot it, he wasn't doing his job.

Now you'd think when my hubby told my dad he forgot the potato salad, my dad would say something like "don't worry about it, we've plenty to eat." We had turkey, dressing, sweet potato casserole, corn pudding, tomato macaroni, green been casserole and green beans cooked with ham. But not my dad, he got in the car to go buy potato salad. The ironic thing is the grocery store was sold out of it when he got there, so we still didn't get to have it. And you know what? We survived! But because my husband was the one who forgot (supposedly), my dad didn't mention it again.

In the second chapter of the bible book of Joshua, Rahab tells a big lie. When she is asked about the spies that had been at her home in Jericho, she answered "Yes, the men came to me, but I did not know where they had come from. At dusk, when it was time to close the city gate, the men left. I don't know which way they went. Go after them quickly. You may catch up with them." She had really hidden the spies on her roof. She lied, but to protect the spies of Joshua's army. And because of her lie, the spies then protected her when they took the land for the Lord. And I can't help but think God quickly forgave her for her lie to save his people.

My husband lied on Saturday to protect me. I know that's a slippery slope to go down, justifying sin. But I just know God will look on my husband as he must have looked on Rahab.

I am so thankful to have a husband to protect my spirit. I shouldn't be so sensitive to my dad's criticism, but I am. I grew up in a dysfunctional home, and often felt unloved. I am so happy to have a husband who meets me where I am and loves me unconditionally.

And I am so thankfully for a heavenly father who loves me unconditionally and who forgives my mistakes and forgets them, as far as the east is from the west. (Psalm 103:12)

But on Friday, I'll blog about why honesty is always the best policy.


Bonita said...

How sad that your dad cares more about potato salad than his daughter's feelings, but how awesome that you have a husband who loves you so much and is truly a protector and defender.

P.S. I'm not saying lying is okay, but I think heart motives are also important. Some people do all the right things with wrong motives while others might slip up now and then, but have very pure intentions. Only God knows the heart.

Alyce said...

What a wonderful husband you have. What a blessing. I too dealt w/ criticism growing up and its so hard when the things that were told to me, come out of my mouth. We must be so careful!

Chatty Mom said...

Alyce -
I visited your blog before, by clicking on your name. But lately when I do it says your profile is not accessible. I'd love to visit again, so let me know your blog address.

Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving comments. It is so encouraging!

Alyce said...

Try this..if this doesn't work, let me know please.


Sue said...

What God commends about Rahab is her faithfulness to Him. She was in awe of the work of God's hands and her willingness to save His people was made clear by her testimony.

I now am left wondering what other option she could have had other than lying. How often we find ourselves reaching for the quick solution to get us out of the jam, which might not be the right-by-God answer, even though it served the purpose.

And, again, the amazing thing is that God left her actions in tact. At the moment she expressed that faith in Him, could He not have brought about another solution to lying? Did He leave that in the Scriptures that we might recognize ourselves in Rahab and yet continue to have hope!? (That she is mentioned for her faithfulness in Hebrews is an encouragement for us!)

As Bonita said, only God knows the heart, and God recognizes true faith when He sees it.

We are very fortunate in receiving this woman's story as part of the Bible, because it does affirm that we all are sinners, but that we may all be able to receive the grace of God in spite of our wrongdoing.

Kay Martin said...

That OCD is a monster isn't it? Ironically it isn't the potato'a all the parts being in place and all your father could see was the missing potato salad. My mom, husband, son and my daughter to some degree have some pretty big OCD issues, especially my mom and my husband. I'm looking forward to Heaven when they won't have to battle those pressing wars.

Your husband must be a dear.
Kay Martin