Accepting Grace

One of my job duties is to prep the newsletter for my boss every Friday, for Sunday distribution.  The past Friday I dropped the ball. A family emergency came up,  preoccupying my thoughts, and distracting my focus.  I never even considered the newsletter until Sunday morning, when I saw the completed newsletter come into my inbox - prepared -but not by me.

I immediately emailed my boss, apologizing for the error and explaining what had happened. He immediately responded, "No worries, at all."  And I have no doubt he meant it. After 7 months of working together, and me not missing a newsletter yet, he knows my work ethic. Yet, as I sat there (in church no less), I couldn't accept the grace he so freely gave me. Instead I sat there berating myself for my mistake.

The irony of the situation isn't lost on me.  Jesus died to pay the price for my sins. In full. Yet, how often do I, instead of accepting His grace - and the peace that comes with it - instead continue to berate myself over my failures? As if Jesus wasn't enough.

This is a constant battle for me. Is it for you too? We try to do our best. We want to be known by our actions, not our "intentions." Yet, we aren't perfect, try as we might be.

Jesus paid the price for our failures, not that we shouldn't try to do our best, but that we accept His forgiveness (not to mention the forgiveness of others). There is freedom in His forgiveness and grace. There is peace.

I will continue to do my best for my boss. But, undoubtedly I will mess something up again in the future. I'm human. I'm thankful that I have a Savior who paid the price for my failures. (Not to mention a boss who doesn't expect me to be perfect.) Now, I need to accept that grace, and keep moving forward.

And if by grace, then it cannot be based on works; if it were, grace would no longer be grace. Romans 11:6

Kelly Combs is a Christian wife, mom, writer and speaker. You can learn about Kelly by visiting her website at www.kellycombs.com

It's Better With the Father

I love eating at my dad's house. Even the simplest things just taste better there. I can make the same recipes that he does, yet his still taste better. I finally figured out why! We may make the same dip, but I use low fat sour cream, and he uses the "real" stuff. Of  course, his ends up being richer, creamier and more delicious! That sandwich? While I use 100% whole wheat, he uses a thick white Italian bread. Yes, the whole wheat may be "better" for me, but his definitely tastes better.

There is also the joy of "being taken care of" by my father. As the person who takes care of everyone else in my daily life, it's nice to have someone take care of me for a change. (But don't worry - I do a lot of things to take care of him too!)

My Christian walk can mirror that example. I can look to other things to fill me instead of my time with Jesus. And even when they are "good" things, like volunteering, exercising, or even writing a blog post, nothing really fulfils as much as Jesus. He is the "real stuff" that is definitely better.

Not only there, there is joy in being taken care of by my Father - my heavenly Father.  He knows too well the time I spend caring for everyone and yet I am always in His sight and His is always there for me.

It's better with the Father! The biggest problems are smaller when you have the hope of Jesus, and the best days are better when you know Him. Spend some time creating the real relationship with your heavenly Father. It will be noticeable different than just knowing about Him.

If you don't have a relationship with your earthly dad, God can fill the role of loving Father for you. But if your earthly dad and you have a good relationship, why not give him a call, just to tell him you love him. And remember, God is always on call to hear that you love Him too.

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, 

that we should be called children of God!

 And that is what we are! 

1 John 3:1

Kelly Combs is a Christian wife, mom, writer and speaker. You can learn about Kelly by visiting her website at www.kellycombs.com

The One Thing That Makes My Marriage Last

On Saturday, my husband and I celebrated 17 years of marriage.  There are a lot of reasons why our marriage should not last. Here are just a few:

1. We both come from dysfunctional childhoods, bringing a lot of emotional baggage into the marriage.
2. We are both previously divorced. The divorce rate for 1st marriages is 50%, but rises to 67% for 2nd marriages. Statistically, our chances of staying together are low.
3. We have over a 20 year difference in our ages.
4. We are both strong leaders. Individually this is a great thing, but joined together it can create some dynamic power struggles. 

But there is one reason that we are able to stay together that is bigger than all the reasons we shouldn't be able to. That reason is:

1. Jesus.

That's it. Jesus. You see with God on our side, He makes a huge difference.

Jesus fills the empty spaces left by dysfunctional childhoods, allowing us to be filled by Him, instead of creating the unrealistic expectation of our spouse to complete us.

Jesus shows us grace and mercy for our tremendous short comings. By His example, we are able to forgive one another.

Jesus modeled servant leadership. That allows us both to not only lead lovingly, but to also die to self for one another. He also modeled marriage. Just as He is head of the church, He ordained that my husband is head of the family. I am learning to not only allow that as God leads, but also to accept the freedom that comes with it.

My husband and I may have started our relationship on "shaky ground." But now that we're standing firmly on the Rock, we can experience the abundant life Jesus offers us.  Our marriage is not perfect. We still struggle in some areas. We are still sinners.  But with Jesus on our side, we are more than victorious.

Ask Jesus into your marriage today. When you join with Him, despite what the world predicts, your marriage will not be easily broken.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12

Kelly Combs is a Christian wife, mom, writer and speaker. You can learn about Kelly by visiting her website at www.kellycombs.com

God's Protection

My home is protected by an alarm system. The first thing the alarm company did after installing the alarm is to put up a yard sign, so that everyone would know my home is protected.  My home is now protected in two ways. 

The first is just the knowledge that my home is armed with an alarm will deter many would-be thieves not to try to break into my home. They might decide to try another home without an alarm system.

The second way my home is protected is with the alarm itself. If someone would to break into my home, the alarm would immediately call the police department and have the police at my home in minutes.

Did you know you are marked with a sign?  Believers in Christ have his seal of ownership on us.  "He anointed us, set his seal of ownership on us, and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come." (2 Corinthians 1:22) Like my alarm system, that seal protects us in two ways.

The first is that it may deter some dark forces, whether earthly or spiritual, from coming against us. There is an awareness that we belong to Christ, and that we will be a hard sell on sin.

However, we know that Christians are not exempt from spiritual attack. And that is where the second protection comes in. We are armed, like an alarm system, with the word of God. With his seal, comes the spiritual armor of God, that we can put on daily to protect us. We literally have angels to protect us where ever we go (Psalm 91:11). 

I sleep better at night knowing I am protected by my alarm system. But true peace comes by being protected by God. May God raise a hedge of protection around you, as you fully believe him.

Psalm 91:
Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday.A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked.If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,” and you make the Most High your dwelling, no harm will overtake you, no disaster will come near your tent. For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.  You will tread on the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpent.“Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.He will call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him.With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.”

Kelly Combs is a Christian wife, mom, writer and speaker. You can learn about Kelly by visiting her website at www.kellycombs.com

"It's Just a Season"

I can remember those really really hard days of mothering a preschooler. Some days I thought God must have been crazy to give me a child - because clearly I had no idea what I was doing! During those crazy, chaotic moments, someone would always come beside me and say, "Don't worry, this is just a season." And low and behold, right before I lost my mind, something would give and it would get better. And I'd think, "Whew, they were right! It was just a season and now everything is all better."

But then a funny thing would happen. Right when I was getting comfortable in my new reality of perfect parenting, something would slip and a new problem would arise. What the heck? And I'd be right back to crazy and chaotic days (albeit with different craziness this time). 

And then I came to realize something.  It's ALL a season. Not just the bad stuff, but the good stuff too. And it's not just about parenting.  When your job is going perfect - watch out - because that's just a season, and things are going to get tough.  But that's okay, because the tough stuff is just a season too.

And your marriage - look out friends, the bad season is coming. But if you can just cling to Jesus, know that a good season is around the corner.  But good or bad, it's not forever.  It ebbs and flows.

Life has it's good and bad days, it's good and bad seasons. And one thing I've learned is that the seasons always change. And that's okay! We learn, and grow, and become stronger in the rough seasons. And we rejoice, and relax, and renew during the good seasons.

I think sometimes we wait for the time to come when everything will be alright, and we don't have to experience any more bad seasons. Friends, that isn't going to happen on earth. But if you know and love Jesus, when the seasons of life end, you'll go be with Him, and the seasons will end and our perfect eternity will begin. But until then, on earth, one thing I know is "This too shall pass."  It's just a season.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven. 

Ecclesiastes 3:1-3

Kelly Combs is a Christian wife, mom, writer and speaker. You can learn about Kelly by visiting her website at www.kellycombs.com

What God Gave

John 3:16 is the most widely quoted verse in the Bible, and has been called the most famous Bible verse.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son," it begins. God gave his son. 

That verse sounds so innocent. Like I gave my kids dinner last night. You gave a friend a gift. We gave a concert performance at church. Gave. God gave his son...to die for us. I don't know, I feel like that verse should say more. God gave his son's life. God gave away his heavenly relationship with his precious son. Jesus gave away paradise to walk the earth, full of sinners, and to be falsely accused and murdered! "Gave" just seems like such a weak word for all that happened.

The rest of the verse says, "that whoever believes in him shall not perish, but have eternal life." Whoever. You. Me. Them. Whoever. God gave the greatest gift to us of all times. He gave us his son, to pay the price for our sins, so that we would have eternal life.  And he did it for everyone.  And that word, "believes," isn't just talking about head knowledge, but heart knowledge.

Sometimes when we are very familiar with something, we just spout it out without thought, and I think John 3:16 qualifies in that category. So the next time you are tempted to quickly recite John 3:16, remember what was truly given, what that belief entails, and what you have received as a result.

 For God so greatly loved and dearly prized the world that He [even] gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, so that whoever believes in (trusts in, clings to, relies on) Him shall not perish (come to destruction, be lost) but have eternal (everlasting) life. John 3:16, Amplified Bible

Kelly Combs is a Christian wife, mom, writer and speaker. You can learn about Kelly by visiting her website at www.kellycombs.com

Mental illness and the Church

Recently mega church pastor Rick Warren lost his son to suicide, after years of his son fighting depression. I understand all too well what it is like to have a family member with depression. My mom battled mental illness my entire life. 

My mom has tried to kill herself more times than I can count. It feels like it must be hundreds of times, but likely it's only in the 20s. Her method of choice was drug overdose, but on several occasions she slit her wrists as well, never caring who may find her...whether it be her child or not.

Aside from the suicide attempts are the numerous times she threatened, but did not attempt suicide. The calls to me, as an adult at work, stating, "I think I'm going to kill myself."  But of course meaning, if you do not stop me, I am going to kill myself - somehow the weight of her life or death weighing on me.

I can't imagine a depression that oppressive. And for that I am thankful. Because I don't battle depression. 

But I do battle well meaning Christians who say things like, "You just need to pray for your mom." Or "If you'd just have faith, God would heal her." Again, the weight of her illness weighing on me. 

I didn't cause it. I can't cure it. I can't control it.  Those are the three C's of al-anon, and they have taken the burden that my mom, and so many other well meaning people tried to put on my shoulders. I wish I could cure my mom. I wish I could control the alcoholism and suicide attempts. I wish I could control the mental illness.But I can't.

I feel sorrow for Rick Warren having to deal so publicly with the loss of his son. No doubt, there are people asking him what he did, as if he could control his son's situation - which he of course could not. To Rick, I would say, remember those 3 C's.

And to all the well meaning people wondering why "we" - the family and friends of the mentally ill - don't do more to fix the situation, I invite you to look to God. He gives us all free will. That includes the free will to make bad decisions.

If God does not control human behavior, what makes you think we could?

Kelly Combs is a Christian wife, mom, writer and speaker. You can learn about Kelly by visiting her website at www.kellycombs.com